A year had passed and I was staring at my computer screen to
a message from a man that had took the time out to write me several long
paragraphs...before I even read the message...I thought...this is it...this man
knows something....and well...he did...
His message began quite matter-of-factly with him confessing
that he saw my message over a year ago and simply had ignored him. But, now a
year later...curiosity had gotten the best of him. He went on to tell me that
he needed some clarification from me before he could disclose any further
information to me. He explained that in the past several people had tried to “maneuver”
(his words, not mines) their way into his family and he first needed to make
sure I didn’t want anything from the.
My reaction: Disbelief!!! Anger!!! Excitement!!! All rolled
in one....the audacity of this man to approach me as if I am some money0hungry,
broke, and dissolute child that is in search for a handout. Absolutely not, I
have never nor will I ever want anything from this family besides the
truth....and maybe acceptance (Still working on a definitive conclusion about
that one.). Needless to say, I took several deep breaths, shot up a quick
prayer and begin to respond as eloquently as possible. I of course included my
college education, multiple degrees, and pursuit of an M.D. (still in the
making). I spoke of my lovely family that I was blessed with and concluded it
by telling him I LOVE my family, I’m content with them...but I have a childish
aspiration to find people who I actually look like...that’s all I wanted...it’s
all I’ve ever wanted.
After what seemed like an eternity...he replied. He told me
that he remembered his parents talking about me years ago and he stayed out it
because it was grown folks business. He said his brother had been in trouble
and had been shipped off to avoid causing his parents anymore headaches. He
said he didn’t keep in touch with his brother, but figured he was still in
Georgia somewhere, but he didn’t know for sure. He said he remembered once
meeting another young mother who said she had a child with his brother but he
did not keep in touch. I now believe that he is talking about me because I
remember my mother saying she gave a picture of me to one of his brothers a
long time ago.
He concluded the letter by telling me we should take it slow
and not rush anything. I replied and thanked him for his reply and then there
was NOTHING...not one other word....this man proceeded to add me as a friend
and I checked several months later and he had deleted me....
That pain...was worse than being ignored....why would
someone do that? I thought that was unusually cruel and coldhearted. I guess it
was foolish of me to think this man who had never met me would embrace me as his
niece. I just figured I would never turn my back on someone who said they were
family. I convinced myself that his slow must be a different kind of slow, but
now...two years later...unless this man has snails as distant relatives....he’s
officially the slowest man on earth.......
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